Language: My Barrier
One of the top ten questions I've been asked in new social settings while living abroad is, "do you speak the language?". For us, that language is German, yes, in Austria they speak German. There are variations, dialects if you will and Austrian, even Viennese German, can carry several distinctions given to the form but German it is. And German I am currently struggling with.
Let me provide a bit of background here. I took four years of Spanish in high school. No, I was not fluent but I could sing a wicked, Canta Y No Llores. When my brain is processing speaking in a foreign language Spanish is my default. Next is Turkish. Our family lived in Izmir, Turkey for one year and the Things and I attended Turkish lessons once, sometimes twice a week for a good portion of our time there. I knew enough to "pass" for a local while moving through our community. Ordering at restaurants was no problem, negotiating in the market place was even fun on occasion and then when I started being mistaken for an actual Turk things usually took a turn for the worse. The cadence and speed of conversation accelerated and I was lost amidst translation. I suppose it was my darker skin, brown eyes and curly hair. I'm not really sure but if Husband Jared was with me I was almost always the one approached and spoken to in the native Turkish. As if I would understand or at the least be able to navigate the request, admonishment, questions, etc. Go figure. Turkish is not a simple language. One wrong syllable misplaced within the base word and it is possible to go from saying yes, I understand, to no I don't. And don't even get me started on sentence structure. It is possible for one word alone to have the impact of an entire sentence. My head is spinning just thinking about it. And still, my mind associates foreign living with Turkish, sometimes Spanish and now German.
This realization arrived recently while on a trip to New York. I found myself answering, "danke" to waiters and waitresses, "bitte" when I needed to say excuse me or please and "entschuldigen" when I bumped into the throes of people walking the city streets. Rather odd. This seems to have happened relatively quickly. My mind became accustomed to hearing German, deciphering signs and other communicae in German and so much so that when I now hear English out of context, such as in my everyday ventures, I become disoriented. Although my ears do perk up and I take notice. Because, hello, I understand you! Let's become friends and go for a coffee and speak my native tongue. Oh how easy that would be.
Even though German is an everyday part of my life here in Vienna I still do not speak my current country of residence's mother tongue. Sure I understand market talk as I call it, the simple pleasantries and plethora of greetings shared both upon meeting and leaving every social situation but that is my limit. Typically when I attempt my best German ordering at a restaurant or cafe the person on the receiving end will promptly switch to English. Yes, my German accent is that pitiful. And yes, it is totally for a lack of effort. We were provided with a private language tutor upon our move here. A certain number of hours for our family to acclimate, learn German and maybe even gain some cultural context. As all who have lived abroad or speak multiple languages know, context really is everything.
Back to language lessons. We began strong, our tutor came to our home once a week for about an hour and a half. All of us at the table, workbooks at the ready, his iPad displaying notes and vowels and endings and, and and! My head hurt. He was brilliant. Fluent in ten languages but had passable knowledge of at least thirteen I believe. The night of our first lesson he shared with us his philosophy, one Husband Jared and I were in agreement with and is proven to be quite effective. And then before leaving or maybe in the middle of our lesson as I was visibly frustrated, he said this, "learning a new language is 80% emotional". Pardon me sir. The challenge became tangible and I had somewhat of a revelation on the spot. Not wanting to use that little tidbit as an excuse but more so I began to understand why I was experiencing such a mental block. I didn't want to learn. I wasn't even sure German was/is worth learning. A majority of the time I can find English speakers in the city. Although it would be so nice to be able to answer the sweet elderly lady asking me for directions on the train, or respond to the man screaming at me for being in his way or not following some unspoken rule. My brain goes into overdrive and this results in an overwhelmed, saddened and frustrated Leanna, unable to respond in English, yet alone German.
Please hear me on this. I do not intend to be disrespectful of the Austrians, of their language or their culture. On the contrary, I am an Austrian resident and it would really be in my best interest to be able to converse in German. Certainly it speaks volumes to those natives when I do try, or relay to them that my skills are not adequate but I am learning. Husband Jared and Thing 4 are immersed daily, so much so that Thing 4 can easily respond to questions asked, give directions and shop in German. He even has the proper accent. To help him continue his progression he will be starting an intensive course in just a few weeks. Twice a week for two hours each day he will be diving deep and growing his vocabulary and understanding of Austrian German. Which, in the case that you were not aware, is vastly different than German-German, as alluded to above. The fluctuations are in different places, the pronunciation is not as crisp sounding and for me it sounds like an attempt at being sing songy and a whole lot of "shhh" sounds.
My lack of German understanding has let me down on more than one occasion. Other expats and non native German speakers have assured me that it is a difficult language. On the other hand those that do speak it or in my experience teach it are quick to offer an alternative opinion. Here are a few of those "helpful" encouragements I have heard as of yet. Rules are rules, they do not change as in the English language. True enough. But it does seem that there are quite a few of them and one insignificant slip up and it's all for not. The endings, meaning the forms, are what they are. Not as many exceptions as in the English language. You can add just two letters and the word can change from present to past tense. Always. Well, except for those words that don't apply. Feel free to fact check me on this. I am under no false pretenses here that I grasp this language and all it's rules and such completely. One word can have several different meanings and is used for vastly contradictory purposes. When translating this language to English I have encountered several stumbling blocks. As in, there just aren't enough words in German for all of our flowery and superfluous English. See previous sentences. There you have it, a few of the complications I have encountered. Now, if you are like my daughter and foreign languages come easily this might all sound ridiculous. Pedantic and over the top. It might just be. However, this is my reality and who knows maybe this act of writing about it is an attempt in overcoming the road block built up in my brain when it comes to the German language.
Now before I am inundated with all the latest research on learning a new language, such as the how-to's of mastering a foreign language, etc. please know that I have Ted Talks bookmarked on the most beneficial strategies, I am reading a book on neuro science and creating new brain pathways, and most of all I am believing big for a miracle. You know, the one where I wake up and begin my morning practises and when Husband Jared walks into the kitchen for a cup of coffee I nonchalantly ask him, "Möchten Sie eine Tasse Kaffee?". Which translated to English means, "Would you like a cup of coffee"?. I was kindly told as Husband Jared was reading this that I did not need to greet him so formally in the morning. He said, "Möchtest du Kaffee?" would suffice. Yet another example of my misunderstanding of this language. Although, he added that if I'd like to include the formal Herr Magister Hanson, thus acknowledging that he is lord and has his masters degree, that would most definitely be acceptable. Ahem. And so will begin my immersion and love of German.
Please hear me on this. I do not intend to be disrespectful of the Austrians, of their language or their culture. On the contrary, I am an Austrian resident and it would really be in my best interest to be able to converse in German. Certainly it speaks volumes to those natives when I do try, or relay to them that my skills are not adequate but I am learning. Husband Jared and Thing 4 are immersed daily, so much so that Thing 4 can easily respond to questions asked, give directions and shop in German. He even has the proper accent. To help him continue his progression he will be starting an intensive course in just a few weeks. Twice a week for two hours each day he will be diving deep and growing his vocabulary and understanding of Austrian German. Which, in the case that you were not aware, is vastly different than German-German, as alluded to above. The fluctuations are in different places, the pronunciation is not as crisp sounding and for me it sounds like an attempt at being sing songy and a whole lot of "shhh" sounds.
My lack of German understanding has let me down on more than one occasion. Other expats and non native German speakers have assured me that it is a difficult language. On the other hand those that do speak it or in my experience teach it are quick to offer an alternative opinion. Here are a few of those "helpful" encouragements I have heard as of yet. Rules are rules, they do not change as in the English language. True enough. But it does seem that there are quite a few of them and one insignificant slip up and it's all for not. The endings, meaning the forms, are what they are. Not as many exceptions as in the English language. You can add just two letters and the word can change from present to past tense. Always. Well, except for those words that don't apply. Feel free to fact check me on this. I am under no false pretenses here that I grasp this language and all it's rules and such completely. One word can have several different meanings and is used for vastly contradictory purposes. When translating this language to English I have encountered several stumbling blocks. As in, there just aren't enough words in German for all of our flowery and superfluous English. See previous sentences. There you have it, a few of the complications I have encountered. Now, if you are like my daughter and foreign languages come easily this might all sound ridiculous. Pedantic and over the top. It might just be. However, this is my reality and who knows maybe this act of writing about it is an attempt in overcoming the road block built up in my brain when it comes to the German language.
Now before I am inundated with all the latest research on learning a new language, such as the how-to's of mastering a foreign language, etc. please know that I have Ted Talks bookmarked on the most beneficial strategies, I am reading a book on neuro science and creating new brain pathways, and most of all I am believing big for a miracle. You know, the one where I wake up and begin my morning practises and when Husband Jared walks into the kitchen for a cup of coffee I nonchalantly ask him, "Möchten Sie eine Tasse Kaffee?". Which translated to English means, "Would you like a cup of coffee"?. I was kindly told as Husband Jared was reading this that I did not need to greet him so formally in the morning. He said, "Möchtest du Kaffee?" would suffice. Yet another example of my misunderstanding of this language. Although, he added that if I'd like to include the formal Herr Magister Hanson, thus acknowledging that he is lord and has his masters degree, that would most definitely be acceptable. Ahem. And so will begin my immersion and love of German.
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